What A Friend We Have In Jesus
9/12/2026
Elijah McSwain, Sr.
Proverbs 18:24 (NKJV) A man who has friends must himself be friendly, But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.
John 15:13 (NKJV) Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends.
There is a recollection of a story about a Sunday School teacher who asked her class to give a short definition of the word “friend”. Some of the responses she received from several students included: A friend is someone who agrees with me on everything. A friend is someone who laughs at all my jokes, even when they are not funny. A friend is someone who pretends to listen to me. A friend is someone I can boss around. A friend is someone who lets me play what I want to play. A friend is someone who lets me hog the video game whenever I go to their house. The teacher was stunned by the answers she received. So, the teacher decided to teach the students an objective lesson about friendship. She stated that a friend is someone with whom you spend quality time. A friend is someone with whom you share common ideas and interests. A friend is someone who lends a helping hand. A friend is someone who treats you as they would like to be treated. A friend is caring. A friend is loving. A friend is respectful. A friend prays for you. A friend has your best interests at heart. After the lesson on the nature of a true friend, one student replied, “Well, I guess I don't have any real friends.” 1 The reality of this story is a sad misconception in today’s world. Many people have a tainted view of the nature of true and genuine friendship. In relation to the illustration, many friendships today are built on deception, bullying, selfishness, belittlement, egotistical behavior, hidden motives, personal agendas, and personal gain. Friendships are often used negatively from a one-sided perspective. They are often toxic, lack mutual concern, and are based on manipulation and control.
One individual described the type of friendships in these terms: In the world, there are all kinds of friends. Faucet friends who turn on and off. Fake friends who will fake you out when you need them most. Summer friends who will be there some of the time. Bubble friends who will burst when the pressure is on. Nosey friends who live in your business. Jealous friends who want your possessions. Lying friends who will lie to you. Toxic friends who are full of poison. Unsaved friends who will lead your soul straight to the pit of hell. 2
The term “friend” is used loosely. Often, the loose use of the word does not convey the true meaning of friendship. A true friend will make a positive impact on your life. A true friend will encourage you when you are down. A true friend will be there through the highs and lows. A true friend will comfort your grieving heart. A true friend will offer wise counsel and advice. A true friend will make sacrifices for you. A real friend is committed to genuinely being a friend. Friendships are important to God. Its importance is so vital that the Bible depicts the nature of a friend. Proverbs declares that a friend sticks closer than a brother (18:24). The Gospel of John teaches, “Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends" (John 15:13). Every believer has a friend who is distinct, caring, dependable, faithful, loyal, trustworthy, generous, and sacrificial. The essence of His friendship can be observed in the value of His friendship and the unselfishness in His friendship.
The Value of His Friendship
Proverbs 18:24 is often considered a difficult passage to interpret because of the various interpretations of its opening phrase. The NKJV renders the first portion of the verse as “A man who has friends must himself be friendly” to signify that, in order to have friends, a person must display friendliness. But if you have a digital Bible or a physical Bible with footnotes, the verse, according to the flow of Greek manuscripts, reads “may come to ruin”.
Translations such as the NLT, ASV, DBY, NIV, ESV, and others present the verse as saying that a person with many friends will come to ruin or destruction, or that friends will destroy each other. The RSV transliterates this verse as, “There are friends who pretend to be friends.” The implied meaning is that being overly friendly can attract the wrong kind of friends who will lead a person astray. Indiscriminately choosing friends without exercising discernment will lead to hazardous outcomes. Failure to exercise caution and proper judgment causes individuals to befriend anyone. Consequently, this is how people end up with toxic, poisonous, unfaithful, malicious, jealous, controlling, negative, and many other kinds of friends. Historically, Solomon is attributed with writing this particular proverb. In his authorship of this section, attention is given to the nature of the people we become acquainted with and how it impacts our lives, either positively or negatively. Friendships must be chosen wisely. The manner should be marked by mutual respect, growth, wise counsel, godly insight, and the betterment of one another in the choosing process. Otherwise, attracting the wrong type of friend will lead to heartbreak, chaos, confusion, friction, tension, stress, agitation, and being driven off the right path.
John Gill acknowledged, “Friendship ought to be mutual and reciprocal, as between David and Jonathan; a man that receives friendship ought to return it, or otherwise he is guilty of great ingratitude.” 3
After disclosing the tendencies of insincere friendships, Solomon transitioned to the value of a true friend. He recorded, “But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” The conjunction “but” is used to draw a stark contrast between true friendship and disastrous relationships. The comparison is made between a friend and a brother. The inference suggests that a true friend can have a closer bond than a brother does. There are many brothers and sisters who are blood-related but lack commonality. They have very little in common. However, there are cases as well where a blood relative is your best friend. Many people are fortunate to have brothers and sisters who are close friends. However, in the sense previously stated, a friend can be considered more loyal than a brother. Loyalty is shown by the closeness of friendship. The word “sticks” means “to cling to”. A true friend will not ghost you by abandoning the friendship. Their presence is felt in the good times as well as the bad. A true friend is a constant source of support and a reliable presence. Proverbs 17:17 (NKJV) stresses. “A friend loves at all times, And a brother is born for adversity.” It has been noted by “D. L. Moody’s Bible, “A true friend is like ivy-the greater the ruin, the closer he clings.” It has also been stated, “A brother is born for adversity, that is, one of the great privileges of brotherhood is to be at your side when you need him most.” 4
Born out of the closeness that Solomon presented are natural concern and affection, understanding, appreciation, dignity, integrity, consideration, maturity, level-headedness, honesty, faithfulness, truth, communion, wise communication, guidance, and counsel.
While Proverbs 18:24 is an expression of human friendship in its context, it can also apply to the unwavering friendship found in Jesus. The greatest relational closeness any believer has is association with Jesus. Jesus is the standard of the truest friend. He sticks closer than any human companion. To illustrate this: “Two men were out hunting in the northern U.S. Suddenly, one yelled, and the other looked up to see a grizzly charging them. The first started to frantically put on his tennis shoes, and his friend anxiously asked, “What are you doing? Don’t you know you can’t outrun a grizzly bear?” “I don’t have to outrun a grizzly. I just have to outrun you!” Aren’t you glad we don’t have a friendship like that?” 5 Jesus will never desert us as a friend when things get tough. Hebrews 13:5 states, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” John MacArthur proposed, “Believers can be content in every situation because of this promise. This statement emphasizes the impossibility of Christ deserting believers. It is like saying, “there is absolutely no way whatsoever that I will ever, ever leave you.” 6 Unfortunately, we may walk away from Him, but His desire is always to be in close contact with us. Friendship with Jesus is valuable and worth cherishing. He is a friend who provides the best support, guidance, and comfort, demonstrating His closeness in our lives.
We see the value of His friendship in many ways. His love is inseparable. Romans 8:35-39 (NKJV) expresses, “Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? As it is written: “For Your sake we are killed all day long; We are accounted as sheep for the slaughter.” Yet in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us. For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” He sympathizes with our weaknesses yet offers mercy and grace to help us in times of need (cf. Hebrews 4:15-16).
Jesus is our Mediator, interceding on our behalf with God when our fellowship is disrupted by our sin (cf. 1 Timothy 2:5). He grants peace to the troubled and fearful hearts. John 14:27 (NKJV) proclaims, “Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.” As a faithful friend, Jesus provides access to His Father. Through our connection with Jesus, we are permitted to experience inclusion and the love of God. John 14:6 (NKJV) notes, “Jesus said to him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.” Ephesians 2:18 (NKJV) implies, “For through Him we both have access by one Spirit to the Father.” In Christ, we have family access to God, enabling us to approach Him with confidence (cf. Ephesians 3:12). He comforts us in times of distress. When we are battered and beaten down by life’s woes, He binds our wounds. When we are downtrodden, He cheers our countenance. When we are perplexed, Jesus regulates our troubled minds. He consoles us, soothing our doubts and calming our fears. He is joy in times of sorrow. He strengthens us in our weakness. He carries and shoulders our burdens by allowing us to cast them on Him (cf. 1 Peter 5:7).
The hymnologist wrote,
“What a friend we have in Jesus,
all our sins and griefs to bear!
What a privilege to carry
everything to God in prayer!
O what peace we often forfeit,
O what needless pain we bear,
all because we do not carry
everything to God in prayer!
Have we trials and temptations?
Is there trouble anywhere?
We should never be discouraged;
take it to the Lord in prayer!
Can we find a friend so faithful
who will all our sorrows share?
Jesus knows our every weakness;
take it to the Lord in prayer!
Are we weak and heavy laden,
cumbered with a load of care?
Precious Savior, still our refuge--
take it to the Lord in prayer!
Do your friends despise, forsake you?
Take it to the Lord in prayer!
In his arms he'll take and shield you;
you will find a solace there.” 7
Jesus is a friend whose presence is valued and appreciated. A friend sticks closer than any brother. This is likened to the divine friendship we experience with Jesus Christ.
The Unselfishness In His Friendship
The Gospel of John reveals Jesus’ unselfishness as a friend. John 15:13 (NKJV) proclaims, “Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends.” Jesus demonstrated selflessness in His voluntary act of enduring death on a Roman cross. He willingly laid down His life by tasting death, enabling us to pass from spiritual death to eternal life. John 10:17-18 (NKJV) states, “Therefore My Father loves Me, because I lay down My life that I may take it again. No one takes it from Me, but I lay it down of Myself. I have power to lay it down, and I have power to take it again. This command I have received from My Father.” His sacrificial act of tasting punishment for our sins embodied the essence of His love. Calvary is the greatest display of His love for His friends. He freely exhibited love by sacrificing Himself for the good of others. His great love prompted Him to act. Jesus knew the sinful condition that plagued humanity. Humanity was held captive by the power of sin, the influence of sin, and the darkness of sin. Being enslaved to sin led to spiritual death as the inevitable result. Death loomed over the human population, for death was the reward for sin. Romans 6:23 (NKJV) acknowledges, “For the wages of sin is death.” The recompense of sin was the paycheck written in death.
But Christ loved others in such a way that God gave Him as a gift to redeem those who were His enemies, so they could become His friends. The greatness of His love was measured by what He gave, His life, in exchange for temporary punishment so that we could have a newfound position and legal standing before God.
We are no longer alienated from God but have been brought near to God through the blood of the Lamb. He willingly gave His life for us to be received through His sacrificial death. He died a horrible death. His grave was numbered among the wicked so that wretched people who opposed His Father could come to know Him as a friend. He was generous to leave the glorious presence of heaven, temporarily enter time, space, and matter, and endure ridicule, shame, agony, grueling pain, and separation from the Father at the cross for us. The sacrifice of Jesus was vicarious, as He became our substitute through substitutionary atonement. 1 Peter 3:18 (NKJV) is penned: “For Christ also suffered once for sins, the just for the unjust, that He might bring us to God, being put to death in the flesh but made alive by the Spirit.”
He incurred our penalty. He became subject to our judgment. He experienced the wrath of God for our sake.
Isaiah 53:3-10 (NKJV) declares, “He is despised and rejected by men, A Man of sorrows and acquainted with grief. And we hid, as it were, our faces from Him; He was despised, and we did not esteem Him. Surely He has borne our griefs And carried our sorrows; Yet we esteemed Him stricken, Smitten by God, and afflicted. But He was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our iniquities; The chastisement for our peace was upon Him, And by His stripes we are healed. All we like sheep have gone astray; We have turned, every one, to his own way; And the LORD has laid on Him the iniquity of us all. He was oppressed and He was afflicted, Yet He opened not His mouth; He was led as a lamb to the slaughter, And as a sheep before its shearers is silent, So He opened not His mouth. He was taken from prison and from judgment, And who will declare His generation? For He was cut off from the land of the living; For the transgressions of My people He was stricken. And they made His grave with the wicked— But with the rich at His death, Because He had done no violence, Nor was any deceit in His mouth. Yet it pleased the LORD to bruise Him;
He has put Him to grief. When You make His soul an offering for sin, He shall see His seed, He shall prolong His days, And the pleasure of the LORD shall prosper in His hand.” Thomas Schreiner wrote, “Because of God’s great love, he sent Christ to bear the punishment of our sins. Christ died in our place, took to himself our sin … and guilt … and bore our penalty so that we might receive forgiveness of sins.” 8 Jesus is a true friend. Romans 5:6-8 (NKJV) affirms, “For when we were still without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly. For scarcely for a righteous man will one die; yet perhaps for a good man someone would even dare to die. But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
He took joy in the cross. He took pleasure in trading places with humanity. He took comfort in reconciling men to God. He offered Himself up to sinful men’s violent hands to give us a better way of life.
His unselfish act appeased God. 1 John 2:2 (NKJV) signifies, “And He Himself is the propitiation for our sins, and not for ours only but also for the whole world."
His unselfish act is the gateway to new life, redemption, liberation, eternal hope, a glorious future, and freedom from condemnation.
The Lord is a gracious friend who took on our humiliation so that we might live. Bruce Hurts mentioned, “By His blood, He made it possible for us to enter into the New Covenant which helps us understand why from a Christocentric perspective the term FRIEND is so rich and full of meaning to us as His disciples. In other words, friend (philos) is a covenant term with a much deeper import in Scripture than in our modern culture.” 9 We have a covenantal friendship with Christ as the New Covenant was established by His blood (cf. Luke 22:20). His blood became the cost that secured His covenantal relationship with us. Friendship with Christ came at a steep price. He willingly laid down His life so that we could be called His friends. Praise God for the unselfishness in His friendship.
Notes
Unknown source
Gill, John. "Proverbs 18:24." In Gill's Exposition of the Whole Bible. 1771. StudyLight.org. Cited 10 September 2026. Online: https://www.studylight.org/commentaries/geb/proverbs-18.html.
The Believer’s Bible Commentary
https://ministry127.com/resources/illustration/outrunning-a-friend
The MacArthur Study Bible
https://hymnary.org/text/what_a_friend_we_have_in_jesus_all_our_s
Schreiner, T. 2006. The Nature of Atonement: Four Views. InterVarsity Press.
